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Mālō e lelei and aloha! I am truly honored to be on the campus of Brigham Young University–Hawaii. BYU–Hawaii was my family’s ticket to America when my parents arrived here fifty-five years ago. I am impressed with the theme of this conference. It is beautiful and fitting for such a time as this, especially for this generation because, yes, there are stories, achievements, and voices of women who have shaped, refined, and helped to realize the Latter-day Saint experience in the Pacific and Asia. I know this because in the teaching profession my strengths as a Pacific Islander teacher have been my voice and visibility.

Reflecting on what I would speak on, these questions kept lingering in my mind: “Who are the Latter-day Saint women in the Pacific and Asia? Whose voices? What are their stories and achievements?” They must be women in the public eye with substance and esteem, I thought. A feeling of guilt came over me that I, a Pacific Islander, a Tongan, did not know the stories of these women.

Left to right: Uinise Salote Taimi Wolfgramm, Lynette Suliana Sikahema Finau, and Ruby Potenitila Wolfgramm Sikahema as featured on the announcement for Lynette’s PhD graduation. Courtesy of Lynette S. Finau.

Turning to a secular method of finding answers, I conducted an informal one-on-one conversation survey with forty Pacific and Asian members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, asking the question “Who is the most influential or prominent woman in your life?” Interestingly, across generations and across cultures, almost all the participants said either their mother or grandmother or both. I proceeded to ask if they could share their stories as to why these women were so impactful in their lives. Astounded by the rich and inspiring stories, I inquired if what they were sharing was recorded or documented. Unfortunately, they all said no. I followed up by asking, “So if someone is not born or married into your family, they have no way of knowing the greatness of your mother and grandmother?” Pondering a bit, they reluctantly agreed. Participants had not yet considered that their mother’s and grandmother’s legacy of faith was preserved in the memories of a relatively few persons. It was then that I realized the moral force of grandmothers and mothers in our lives. Many are unsung and unrecognized heroes. They are unheralded women who are changing the world by strengthening the family and Church in the Pacific and Asia, yet we do not hear enough about them.

Two years prior, my PhD graduation began with an invitation that included the photographs of my grandmother Uinise Salote Taimi Tongi Wolfgramm and her oldest daughter, my mother, Ruby Potenitila Wolfgramm Sikahema, one on each side of me. Both women unfortunately did not live long enough to witness this milestone in my life. Why the three photos? It was with the intention that one cannot look without wondering, “There must be a story behind this,” and to creatively preface the “had it not been” narrative. Both women are representatives of those who prepare the way for others to achieve.

My grandmother, who went by the name of Salote, was born in 1921 in the island kingdom of Tonga, a very small speck on the map located in the South Pacific Ocean. Although living conditions for commoners in Tonga were primitive, her upbringing was very modest, but nonetheless she learned the basic agricultural trades and skills that were pertinent for island survival. She was raised in the village of Ha‘ateiho in a home woven from coconut fronds, and she ate the staple foods grown in the fertile soil and land of her father. Despite the lack of modern conveniency, Salote was nevertheless indoctrinated in the importance of education and cultural refinement because it was a time where education, particularly primary and secondary school, played an important role in the development of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Tonga.

As the Church established a foothold in the island kingdom, the Church acquired land and dedicated its first school in 1926, called Makeke.[1] Teachers were service missionaries from America, and Salote fortunately earned the privilege to attend. She was taught the fundamentals of reading; writing; Western literature, thought, and culture, in addition to studying the gospel as part of the school’s curriculum. She was known and described by her peers as “Ko Salote, koe ta’ahine angalelei moe poto” (Salote was a very nice girl and smart [in school]).

Lynette's maternal grandparents: Sione Tufui and Uinise Salote Wolfgramm, 1993. Courtesy of Lynette S. Finau.

Each year, until she graduated from high school in 1940, Salote was ranked top of her class, an accolade she was extremely proud of because it elevated her parents in the community and displayed her love of learning and determination to be successful. Incorporating the secular and spiritual knowledge in Makeke, she understood early the value of education and its power to change lives. Unfortunately, during this era, education ended after high school in Tonga. Opportunities for higher learning required her to go overseas, a personal yearning and desire that simply was not attainable. Salote married into the Wolfgramm family from the northern island of Vava‘u. Through her church callings and community responsibilities, she continued to engage and implement her learning, reading, writing, and honing her newly acquired skills taught by the missionaries. Salote was a self-directed learner, one who is blessed with a genetic predisposition for independent thought, pattern recognition, and creative problem-solving. She was an avid writer with beautiful penmanship and kept a journal that she left for her family. I once heard that reading makes the full man but that writing makes the exact man.[2] This sentiment describes my grandmother.

In 1972, after immigrating to Menlo Park, California, USA, at the age of fifty-one, Salote cleaned the homes of members in her ward to help earn a living. While she was grateful to have a job to assist my grandfather Sione Tufui Wolfgramm in supporting their four youngest children, Salote never lost sight of the value of learning and constantly reminded her children and grandchildren that educational opportunity was the very purpose of her immigration. She would often say to me, at the most opportune time when I was wandering aimlessly with my life “Kapau nau ma’u ho faingamalie” (What I would do if I had your opportunity). It was a loaded statement that forced me to reevaluate my life each time she spoke those words.

Lynette's parents, Loni and Ruby Potenitila Sikahema, 1986. Courtesy of Lynette S. Finau.

My mother, Ruby, who went by her middle name Potenitila, which interestingly is often mistaken for the word potential, was born in 1942, the oldest of Salote’s ten children, and married in 1961. She inherited her mother’s intelligence, faith, talent, and independent thought. When she graduated from the new Church high school Liahona in 1960, the Church College of Hawaii (CCH, now BYU–Hawaii) was in full operation, thus providing opportunities for students at Liahona to leave Tonga to further their education. Potenitila was awarded an academic scholarship to CCH that brought honor to her family. However, she chose to defer her scholarship to get married, a choice she knew would break her family’s heart, especially my grandmother’s. To her family it seemed as if she had lost sight of what each Tongan student aspired to achieve. Following the promptings of her heart, Potenitila’s choice required that she remain firm, upright, and unwavering. She explained to me many years later that it was not a choice between family or education, but that it was family first and education at the same time, an unusual concept for her time. Even though her choice was ostracizing, she knew for herself that she would return to her studies. After marriage, Potenitila served a full-time mission with my father as a young married couple, then made the extensive sacrifices to earn the money needed to travel to New Zealand so that our family could be sealed in the temple in 1967. Because of her unwavering faith and self-belief, she understood the weight of her choices and did more than what was expected of her. Upon returning from New Zealand, her scholarship was reinstated, and she resumed her academic studies at BYU–Hawaii in 1969.

Unfortunately, the challenges of a new immigrant family were more than she could bear. She chose to sacrifice her educational opportunities for her children at the end of her junior year and settled in Mesa, Arizona. Working in a sewing factory was all the work she could find to earn a living, but she was grateful for the work. Despite her circumstances, she was an innovative learner like her mother, putting her children in positions to be successful in new and creative ways. According to my grandmother, this virtue is the embodiment of “‘Atamai ‘A,” the act of keen foresight, which can also be described as a spiritual gift and the capacity of being “quick to observe.”[3] This was a statement my grandmother repeatedly drilled into my mother’s mind and heart as the key to success. Potenitila leveraged the path that used agency, faith, and education.

I chose their photos attached to mine to be recognized as a tribute to the faith and love of education that I inherited from them. Neither my mother nor my grandmother accomplished their goal of earning a college degree. However, their quest for higher learning was a righteous pursuit and desire passed on to their children and grandchildren. This pursuit and desire would lead to new opportunities for service in the Church, community, and professional careers of their descendants. In my eyes, Salote and Potenitila are prominent Latter-day Saint women of the Pacific, despite their achievements, sacrifice, gifts, and faith being known by only a few. I am grateful to be in the spotlight to publicly speak of them.

The scriptures have some of the most magnificent stories that are truly at the center of human experience. The New Testament tells an example of three generations of faith seen in the lives of Lois, Eunice, and Timothy (2 Timothy 1:5). If there was ever an example of training up a child in the way they should go, then Lois and Eunice are perfect examples of this. And if we search the scriptures, unfortunately, we will not find a lot of information about these two women, other than Eunice was a Jew who converted to Christianity (Acts 16). Her faith in Jesus Christ was also held by her mother, Lois, and these two women raised and taught Timothy in that faith. These two women get only a brief mention in the scriptures—unsung heroes—but they have much to teach us about building legacies of faith.

Three generations, left to right: Mele Lupe Tongi, Uinse Salote Tongi Wolfgramm, Ruby Potenitila Wolfgramm Sikahema, 1987. Courtesy of Lynette S. Finau.

Timothy was an up-and-coming leader in the early Christian church and was described as having a godly reputation. In his letter to Timothy, the Apostle Paul writes, “When I call to remembrance the unfeigned faith that is in thee, which dwelt first in thy grandmother Lois, and thy mother Eunice; and I am persuaded that in thee also” (2 Timothy 1:5). When praising the “unfeigned faith” he found in Timothy, Paul noted that this faith came from his grandmother and mother. What could be the moral of Paul’s statement? I believe that Paul’s words to Timothy are a call to action. He wanted to encourage Timothy to remember the faith he had learned through the instruction and example of his grandmother and mother. The faith of these two women, although briefly mentioned in the scriptures, is what set the foundation for Timothy to grow up to be the man and leader that he was. He is a testament to their faith. How often do we reflect on our mothers and grandmothers and give them credit for the faith and courage we are achieving? Here, Paul is elevating women, giving credit to a grandmother and mother, unsung heroes of faith, and so what we lack in input as far as who Lois and Eunice were, we make up for in output in the life of Timothy.

The question “Who are the most prominent women of the Pacific and Asia?” was answered not only by the participants in the survey but also from the quiet examples of Lois and Eunice. My grandmother and my mother are representative of the voices of Latter-day Saint women of the Pacific and Asia. I have inherited their faith, their achievements and stories, and, yes, even their yearnings and unfulfilled dreams to complete. There is nothing more important than our spiritual legacy, especially from women in the scriptures and our mothers and grandmothers. The adage of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow comes to mind:

Lives of great men all remind us.
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sands of time;
Footprints, that perhaps another,
Sailing o’er life’s solemn main,
A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,

Seeing, shall take heart again.
Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.[4]

Who are the truly sublime? It is my grandmother Salote, my mother Potenitila, Lois, Eunice, and so many more women who are remembered for their good works, faithful lives, and righteous yearnings of their hearts. The imprints through their voices, stories, and accomplishments have truly helped to shape and refine my life and will endure throughout the Pacific and Asia, the Church, and for generations to come.

Notes

[1] Michael A. Goodman, “Church Growth in Tonga: Historical and Cultural Connections,” in Regional Studies in Latter-day Saint Church History: The Pacific Isles, ed. Reid L. Neilson, Steven C. Harper, Craig K. Manscill, and Mary Jane Woodger (Provo, UT: Religious Studies Center, Brigham Young University, 2008), 45.

[2] Francis Bacon, Essays of Francis Bacon (2014), 102. In Essay 50, “Of Studies,” Bacon asserts, “Reading maketh a full man; conference a ready man; and writing an exact man.”

[3] David A. Bednar, “Quick to Observe” (devotional address given at Brigham Young University, May 10, 2005), Ensign, December 2006, 31.

[4] Adapted from Henry W. Longfellow, “A Psalm of Life,” Voices of the Night (New York: J. W. Lovell, 1885), 23.